its 5 am
i just found my future song to be played walking down the aisle
if it ever happens...
alicia keys
no
amel larreiux
yes
"no one else"
her famous song
"make me whole"
is what's been playing in my mind for the past month or so



they let me out early at work today
i really needed a break
i left around 2 am
driving through downtown
stoppin at the light beside the shelter
bunch of people sleepin on the parking lot under a tent wrapped in blankets
weird

i never imagined someone close to me getting sick
so unexpected
nursing mode came into play
i hate being on the other side
anxiously waiting what the verdict is
what we would be dealing with
and the plan
watching someone you love and known be in so much pain
is something i never experienced
and it was out of my hands
watching the emergency dept nurses huddled around the nurses station
while your loved one is in pain
i stayed hard core
someone had to be in control and think straight
i broked down on the way home
i just got really really scared

i can't wait to have a full day off
i need time to think
to clear my mind
i need to get away for like an hour or two
turn off my cell phone
and just be
just breathe
with no where to go
i would say i need this by myself
but i really wouldn't mind
enjoying it with someone right now
damn amel larreiux songs for making me feel this way!
damn my pms!
i should sleep now